A Search for Belonging to Self

 A Road Less Travelled ..   I started this Blog back in June 2021, not knowing what the future would hold for me.  Terribly optimistic about life as always, appreciated and seeking knowledge to help me understand the concept of belonging.  It is now almost November and I have found where I belong.  

The discovery, the answer is found in this expression of writing but before I continue, may I say this as it just occurred to me.  It was said by Alexander Pope, "To Err is human but to forgive is divine.  For a moment, may I indulge further on this thinking.  If to be human, is a moment, where we are the epitome of mistakes (ERR), certainly this would constitute an admission of being imperfectly perfect.  Hence, that being the case, the most divine action we can take would be to love ourselves despite our ERR and imperfectly perfect.  Is that not a  soul centered  truth we ought to follow every moment of our lives.

Fast forward  to 2022 and this truth, to give ourselves, love, acceptance, compassion, forgiveness and to seek vulnerability within oneself first in all our imperfectly perfectness is front and center, present every day.  Why would such a group of soulful  be-attitudes  of returning to self be so pronounced. An opportunity had arrived which capitulated every life event I had grown from into one seemly small moment that grew into a massive life change.  A vision of life, my life passing before me a late September morning as I was diagnosed with breast cancer,

In that stillness of time like a inch by inch moving glacier, I stood with family and friends mustering grace, hope, compassion and love, not for myself but for them.  As the realization set in through the many free flowing tears, the look of fear and dread gripped their faces,  You know your impact on life and the life of others you had in times and spaces such as these.  Their emotion was an indication of the thought of loss and how they held space for you in their life. where you belonged.  It is true that it isnt the riches or things you accumulate, but how you make others feel and touch their life.  In the immediate aftermath of being diagnosed with Stage 2 Cancer, which later changed to Stage 3, you can see and feel how you being you belongs in the lives of those you love or have loved.

Belonging since I began this blog draft over a year ago has taken a very different definition for me because over the course of the months since that first diagnosis I have been gifted with many opportunities to learn and grow.  One cannot possibly imagine the beauty that comes from such a life changing diagnosis.  I didn't initially in the moment, however, my ethos and practice has been over the years is to kneel before my God and surrender myself to him asking what is that you want me to learn from this journey and how can I serve and share with others the gifts that arrive?

Cancer treatment isnt just about a physical manifestation of illness, it is an opportunity to create receiving treatments to enable families. friends. faith, love and communities to come together. This is my journey of healing mind, heart, body, soul, and most of all to anchor into belonging to myself.  To speak up, speak out, surrender my truths and take care of me with every ounce of vulnerability.  I learned recently even as incredibly strong as I am, the greatest strength, not weakness is to be vulnerable with yourself first.

Lets finish this out on this note and go back to that day I was diagnosed with cancer.  A room filled with my best friend, my daughter and medical professionals.  There was much sadness in that vulnerable moment where a child realizes she may loose her mother and a best friend her dear friend what does one do.  By default it is easy for me to give to others.  I found strength and courage to put aside myself and gave to those who needed support  - offer a gentle hug, a whisper of I love you along  with a declaration of I got this and we will figure this out. 

When we spend a greater portion of our adult lives giving to others, the biggest opportunity will eventually arrive where we will learn the art of self care and receiving. This I know to be true because that  is part of my story. I belong where ever I choose and without a doubt to mine own self first.  None other can tread the winepress of life like me.  A deep knowing allows me to understand like many of you reading this that  I have always been uniquely equipped to traverse this station in live being enough, having all I need to be the best version of myself. With all I have, and all I am now, I am grateful every day for my relationship with God, myself and life.

The Beginning Of A Journey. A Life Changing Journey For the Better

One cannot image the deluge of thought that plagues your mind when after 40 or more years of breast self-examinations (BSE), how haunting it is to discover a lump. I became more diligent and pedantic in my actions from that moment forward. Every day attempting to diffuse the discovery to nothing more than just fatty tissue or just big breast, my breasts. Then the pain began, striking fear into the very heart of the matter. It was searing pain like engorgement with breast milk, and you cannot pump or allow your baby to suckle just to release the tension.

The truth had arrived, and my truth was that it was time to do something about it. Did the thought of cancer cross my mind - resoundingly YES? But again, that was not possible, ME have cancer. NO damn way and not now - in the prime of enjoying life such as it is in the middle of an almost 2-year pandemic.

I learned from my late husband the phrase - "Trust but verify."  It was time to trust what I felt and have a medical professional either deny or concur with my findings. Late September and it was a beautiful sunny day. Unafraid I sat patiently in a room, fidgeting as if something major was about to happen. I sent a voice note to my soul-heart best friend, Jon while I agonizingly waited. The minutes ticking by slowly. It was dreadful, then in a hiss and gentle roar in bounds my physician with a broad beaming smile, saying Hello and what brings me in to see him. The nerves gone; I find myself sheepishly expressing my concerns about a lump in my breast.

Upon examination, the evidence right there before both of us, eliminated any doubt that this was not something else and a lump. The usual prescribed mammogram was up for bat and to my surprise availability was only two days away. As I slowly walked down the hallways of that hallow space, I felt relieved but now markedly concerned. A mammogram, my first. Yes, I was a mammogram virgin. My breasts over the years had not had the pleasure of smashed, fondled into a corner, squished, or laid out for all the world to see up to this point. 

I knew instinctively what was about to happen. This was not a forecast but a deep knowing and yet I was not afraid, that came later when I watched one of my best friends and my youngest daughter crumble into tears at the news. The news that based on the mammogram, without biopsy, I had breast cancer, however not a lump but two. My reaction that day was to call all my family to let them know, it was not easy being brave to share the news. It takes strength not to personalize reactions and yes, I had my moments of wanting to hang up, say something mean but as my wise Mum said you must understand how they must feel hearing that you, someone they love has cancer.

The journey of Cancer is not only about the patient but the family too. They need support and understanding just as much as I do. Their hearts hurt, feel, and know at the worst, the price is death, a loss of someone they have spent their whole lives knowing - a best friend, a colleague, a sister, an aunt, a daughter, a niece, a grand-daughter, a mother, and a wife. The toll for those left to endure such a horrific illness is worth a hundred lifetimes.

Lifetimes have passed and I am not the first or last to have a diagnosis of Cancer. I will be the first to see the gift of this experience and find my courage, lessons, and strength in it. About two to three days after this moment that I joked that I had the two for one special and how do you buy bras for different sized breast. Will that be one cup or two I said to one of my girlfriends in the wake of the aftermath.

God blessed me to be a well-endowed woman and now the prospect of losing a breast caused me to feel the pain emotionally of understanding what that loss may mean if it happened at all. I left the forecasting of what was to come behind, understanding I had another medical procedure that would seal the radiologists’ findings. The biopsy procedure is the very moment, where certainty revealed, without compunction or question. I was not afraid, I was grateful, yes grateful that in my lifetime, a cancer diagnosis at this time and place gave me the opportunity to have hope because science and technology had evolved so much more.

With a smile and being unapologetically myself, I ventured into the place of discovery and found two amazing woman made of the best soul heart connectivity I had ever chanced to meet in such a life altering moment. Their care, concern and conversation made all the difference especially when that vulnerable childlike soul swallowed back the tears in a wincing reaction to pain, the understanding of what was happening and feeling alone. Alone in the moment finding my courage and strength to breath, appreciate, and find patience with the process. It was my moment to stand into myself, believing that I had not come this far for nothing.

I had not experienced a serious depression, buried two children and a husband, been homeless and made redundant twice to give up now. This was my moment of really digging in. A vision of seeing what I capable of creating to overcome. The results were in and even the Radiologist had to contain her emotions as she told me I had the most common breast cancer - Invasive Ductal Carcinoma.

My truth, my reality, I have Cancer with a small 'C". When you face such a diagnosis, a shrill sound goes through your soul heart and mind as stand in the reflection of your own mortality. But it is a moment, it is not a definition of who I am now, and I am not closing this chapter on my life as if I were handed a death sentence. I understand for a handful of newly diagnosed cancer patients, which is exactly how they feel; nothing prepares you for that. I feel your loss the moment you closed your eyes, drew breath, and gave up. I have given up a million times, most especially, in 2005 when I lost my son, only to stand up and remember that I am worth fighting for, creating about, and living into.

I unapologetically wear my heart on my sleeve, cry over dog, babies, small children, 9-11, taps, a tragedy, chic flicks and a first kiss with someone special. I love life, remember that I am committed to forgiveness and gratitude in every breath I take. My heart sinks when I hear my Mum's voice say goodbye on the phone and it feels like the very last time especially now. 

There is a deep knowing of life experiences that I chose to use my shear will, moving forward, one step at a time. These events in time, because that is all they are now, have not defined me. It is a refinement of my soul perspective that chooses to see the deliciously, deliriously amazing feelings of joy, hope, love, craving, passion, happy, purpose, wonderment, surprise, learning, achieving, giving, serving, laughter and so much, much, more.

My anthem is this ...

 I CAN-CERTAINLY WIN EVERY DAY WHEN I CONNECT TO SOUL LANGUAGE POWERS

C - Constancy in belief of self and my courage to have joy in this MOMENT

A - Answer to the call to live into your NOW

N - Now has arrive to be present to all my life CREATIONS

C - Champion your soul languages as a SOURCE

E - Embrace energy that grows from a choice of POSITIVE POWER

R - Release all unbelief to restore FAITH, HOPE, LOVE & JOY

 

This is dedicated to Jon - Everything is going to be alright... 

A time to Create, A time to Stand

 

Over the course of time, we all experience life in one way or another.  We harness what we know best and often carry what we don't need for fear that we will leave something behind  in order to need it later.  Needing later is a mindset that often I have found myself visiting which in truth is about fear and lack of confidence to believe what I have to offer.   Admittedly it is through effort, care and the outright decision to choose myself that I have found the greatest amount of peace, success and love.  Not love from another, but love, unconscionable out right, full on unconditional love for myself.

The statement that reigns frequently on my mind lately is that I have allowed myself to be an option with me and others around me rather than a choice.  I can candidly say while that may have given me a payoff to serve others, it in the long run has left me out.  Left me out of living into myself and the natural strengths and abilities that lay dormant like a volcano.   What I am about to say is going to sound quite harsh and very judgmental but it is a truth.  We are abusing ourselves when we choose to make ourselves an option not a choice.  The very essence we create breaks down the very fiber of our being, our soul, our hearts. Granted this is my opinion but elementally the fabric of our lives are build on our soul, heart mind connection with ourselves. 

This truth, of soul, heart mind connectiveness has never been more relevant and necessary for each of us.  We stand at a time like no other before and the very synergy and design of our humanity is at risk, is at the center of life.  In a blink of an eye life changes and we are never ready or all are at the epi center of an energy that can make or break us.  

My life, my moments have brought me to realize something very simple.  I choose myself, not out of greed or selfishness but because the greatest relationship I can ever create or develop is the one that I have with myself.  I am not an option, living life fully is not an option, it is a gift to ourselves and those we love.  I choose myself, my care, my word, my soul heart reactions to life and that by doing so, I will enrich the lives of others through how my perspective grows and truly sees.   To see is to know, a deep knowing, without explanation just following.  This moment, this time to create is part of that thinking.  This is the season for me to write and capture my gift inside the lives of others.

I am on a journey to touch lives.  To share stories, to elevate hope, bring joy, light, laughter and a giving energy into your lives every day.  It is my goal to share my moments with myself and those that touch the lives of others, the unsung extraordinary heroes living ordinary lives. 

Join me as I launch the written and spoken word of Michelle Moments - a place, a space where love, unconditional love, joy, hope, compassion and kindness dwell.  Where we celebrate and champion each other. 

An Extraordinary Gift

Have you ever been in search of light and love in the darkest of moments? Did you find the light, inspiration, and hope that you needed OR did it find you? Often, the message reached you just as it needed to and in timeliness.

In a world of noise, a message is created for you, yes you - wherever you are now; shared with love and light.

Extraordinary - it is an adjective to describe a state of being, beyond the usual, it is of character of worth and remarkable.  In the truest sense moving beyond ourselves in a state of service with character that optimizes a connection to humanity. Humanity which demands our compassion, forgiveness, hope, love, kindness in disproportionate portions such as unconditional - without expectation of return.

Being extraordinary is to take the time to understand what matters most to those around you and live into their perspective without judgement or coercion of our beliefs, without manipulation to ensure you first.  Simply put Extraordinary is taking the ordinary and going the extra mile.

Going the extra mile is taking the time to think of others and hearing them without derisiveness or flack. It is that child who says they do not want to but cannot express why. Yet when you look at them, you will find fear, apprehension, anxiety, unsure of themselves, sometimes self-will that is a proponent of the underneath because survival just kicked in. Getting down to the level of the other person often literally, loving them and letting them see you where they are. It is our greatest gift and that is not just for our children or grandchildren, spouses, partners it is for all humankind.

Gear yourself up and put on the mental vision of what light and love you can give to others in such an ordinary way. Ordinary is not mediocre, it is brilliance on fire because when coupled with extra, we can give marvelous gifts that do not cost you anything but your time, your energy from the soul and heart. It is small ripple effect it has will be felt for a lifetime. Let me share a deeply personal experience recently to illustrate this point. It is not being shared to gloat or ask for your sympathy but merely to invite a vision of effect. 

This year has been a different year than all others with COVID for many of us. I am blessed to still be working, however this as with every year I scrambled to figure out how to create Christmas for my daughter. She firmly with a passion believes in Santa Claus, Father Christmas, and Saint Nick. I do not want to derail her belief because it is so pure hearted. As a single parent home, I have a very modest income and making ends meet takes creativity with shortfalls. I am grateful, for the kindness of strangers with all my heart who without me asking showed up for our family. Through their gestures of love, light and to them ordinary, a child will have an extraordinary Christmas. Her wish list of three things has been fulfilled, leaving a bright-eyed child glowing in her belief. Thank you for the wonderful gift of being present to the ripple of my daughter.

Extraordinary is not as difficult as you may think. To be extraordinary takes a momemt to just decide to take the journey of discovery.  A discovery of self, who you are and those things that intrinctly are you.  For me it is to be kind, compassionate, forgiving, share what you have without reservation and give with a spirit of joy - wholehearted joy.  In that very moment lives are touched forever changed.   Stand tall, live into who you are on the inside, take a risk to give without reciprocation or expectation. I give because I am living from a space of creating, knowing my ripple, my kindness, care, heart, and soul is touching another, making a difference.  A difference as I have often said lasts a life time.

It is about choices.  The choice to follow what you know instinctively.  To know is to feel.  To feel is to truly  hear, and to hear is to hear the sound, rhythm your soul speaks.  In that conversation you will connect on a level that receives and gives with greater impact.

Stop today and listen for the soul queues that lead you into your humanity.  Gifts that may be as small to you but greater to the other. Perhaps - hold open a door, say Thank You or Good Morning with heart in your voice.  Stop today what you are doing now and make that call to someone you know is alone.  Take a basket of goodies with a note to a family you know is struggling.  When the blessing and generosity comes to you as it has to me, give to someone else your  soul connected abundance and you will see how extraordinary looks and feels on you.

A smile broadly seen, a tear of thanks gently moving down a cheek, a long hug in appreciation is the vision of splendor dancing in my heart today and every day because Christmas, giving and Extraordinary are 365 days.

Unsung Extraordinary Heroes Living Ordinary Lives - A tribal Celebration of Light and Love - A Family Affair

Following my soul heart intuition, I find myself in a precariously happy place.  That space on the vibration continuum was fueled by a preliminary get to know you interview with a family.  The universe had spoken.  I felt the call to action and my heart sent me packing with computer in hand and enthusiasm graced on my voice.

The next three blogs will be about the influence, individuals, families and communities have with one another and the family I will be introducing in this new series, carries a heart, soul light that radiates from the inside out despite tragedy.

We will not be visiting the tragedy because that is cruel and unusual punishment to embellish the dark of a moment in time when all seemed lost, lonely, uncertain, weary, and cold.  Much like that lost puppy in the cold looking for a way home.  Yet in that chill of life, they found refuge amongst the warm of love, support and coming together. Instead we will celebrate their victories through a life change that muddied the water but filled their buckets with sunshine.

There is more to tell and in truth there is not one morsel I want you to miss out on so I will leave you with this thought, knowing there is more to come soon.  Here is your nugget of inspiration.

How do you feel about your Happy?

Photo by Matheus Bertelli from Pexels

Life Experiences - Will They Make or Break Us?

This is dedicated to my best friend.

Your life is a legacy and inspiration to many, most especially me. Firstly, thank you for the enormous sacrifice you gave to our beloved country even when it has left you empty. You have seen war, all kinds of atrocities related to such insidious moments that rob the soul, your soul. Thank you for your daily inspiration that brings me to the well of life, feeling filled. Thank you for believing in me and having those hard conversation that I needed to hear.  Throughout your life you have felt the success of being an Entrepreneur, Mentor, and valiant support to those who counted on you. You know the pangs of disappointment, ridicule, bullying and yet you stood where are with strength, courage and hope one foot in front of the other keeping going even now.

To say that life is what we make it is an understatement and my dear friend is the greatest example. At each point and time, a keen awareness of self and the vision of the goal at hand has been his steady mental meal. The question is when you reach a crossroad in your life amidst a realization that the latest journey had left your helpless, powerless, and less than who you are. In those critical moment, our deciding points will gear us toward an endless abyss or hope. Often, in this critical mass moment we are held, even stymied frozen by our own latent sense of giving up hope for a better tomorrow, comparing where we once were, looking back over our shoulder hoping by some miracle our previous life and self will return.

Realistically it is better to stop, wave a fond farewell to our past selves and give ourselves grace - forgiveness.  This very key unlocks the potentiality to move forward with renewed life.  It is a key because it allows us to renew hope, faith, and belief in ourselves. Forgiveness is a call to action word.  The root word FORGIVE is defined as to feel resentment against an offender (yourself) - we no longer incite punishment or redress toward ourselves.  We make a concerted effort to censure ourselves for our past misgivings.  Do you get a sense of how powerful FORGIVE & FORGIVENESS really is?

At that crossroad we FORGIVE, let go of and put one foot in front of the other, knowing how imperfect we really are.  With that grace in hand, we then, step toward that pool of water, that puddle on the ground, that reflection that catches our eye and face it with a broken heart, heavy soul and tear stained cheeks, quivering lips.  Why must we face that image?

We face the image to come to a place of indulging ourselves in celebrating all that we are.  Giving credence to our lives.  Through the tears we can surely take a moment to think on those instances however brief or long where we were our true soulful self.  You know those moments, when you decided not to yell at your children for breaking curfew but smiled at them because you were so glad, they were home.  OR ... when your wife just found out her Dad died, and she snapped at you. You held her tight.  For me, it was giving grace - forgiveness to the person(s) who harmed my daughter, my grandchildren, and me.   It is those moments in your life when being kind and sharing all you must be given to one who has none.  Those instinctive, soul driven moments we denied we ever had and left at the curbside at the train station of life. 

It is time to find that intuitive, instinctive self and be innovative in your vision, passion, and purpose.  Stephen De Sede often has said, "Life is not about you."  It is and I agree about everyone else around us.  Which brings me to the next learning - find a way to serve and give to others even in that moment of facing a life changing path.  Giving a part of yourself away, will lead you to a journey of finding yourself.  It is not just about random acts of service because in truth, giving and service is an everyday event.  Ask yourself prayerfully, when in meditation or pondering life to be guided to ways and people that you can serve.  By making that your intention, it will give you the strength and courage to keep going with an attitude of gratitude.

Gratitude is a virtue that every day we ought to practice with a passion.  When we find the grace of gratitude, we find everything that we have is enough.   We find that we have more than we ever realized.  Gratitude gives us the opportunity to celebrate life and its rich blessings of abundance even in a moment of hurt, pain and suffering.  This is not said to be morose but after the flame of the fire has died down, there is a quintessential time and place to give gratitude the grace it deserves in our life.  Gratitude and giving to others are great partners in the healing of the soul, heart, and mind.

Life is an evolution, a journey where the destination is not nearly as important as the experiences we have.  Experience teaches us but does not define us.  We define who we become, and character is built by our intent.  

I - I give selflessly

N - Nurture others and self

T - Timeless Gratitude 

E - Empower with Kindness

N - Nirvana - transcend your suffering with love for others

T - Touch lives soulfully every day.

My last words to champion YOU is this ... 

Find your bliss point, your passion and give yourself permission to follow it. When you choose to do that very act, your soul, heart, and mind will celebrate.  Listen to the whispers of the universe for your call to action because happiness, true soul depth happiness is up to us every step of the way.  Others, things, and titles cannot give us happiness as much as we try to believe that.   We, in the end, will garner happiness within ourselves through acts of self-loving, rather than self-loathing and incrimination. Do not take my word for it, perhaps it is time to put action behind your words and see how your perspective and vision changes. 

UNNOWN HERO - A hero in the Making

 

Today is not like any other day, it is a day to seize a moment where I hear my soul and heart song to champion the tune of humanity, love, kindness, compassion and understanding.   Have you ever wondered why you cling to that moment in the movie when superheroes come together to save the very fabric of humanity?  It is because we yearn to stand up and out for something greater than ourselves, wishing for a superpower to navigate the ills of life.

The truth is that we have super-powers, soul language already within us that beckons us to a call to action.  Often, we brush that intuitive inspiration off as just a moment that was a coincidence.  It is in truth the universe calling us to action.  Should we happen per-chance to venture past the limited thinking to see the light, it is soon shut down.  

In the quiet space of our mind, we lack the vision to see ourselves without opinion or ego, good, challenged, singed, broken and damaged.  Of the things we have in passing thought surface or deep we gravitate to the singed, broken and damaged part, staying there forever lost in our grief, giving up any possibility of a superpower erupting from our very souls.

How do you deal with the raw of your soul to rise and emerge from the ashes like a Phoenix?  It is not easy, I am not going to lie, but it is doable, extremely attainable.  What it takes is tenacity, drive, courage, understanding, acceptance, love for yourself, forgiveness for yourself and largely a shift in your mindset on how you approach challenges, which are really opportunities.  Opportunities to grow and move through life.  We can educate, learn, practice and reiterate, review all we want, but truthfully your mind vision, sight or mindset is at the root of change.

Change is about adapting to our conditions and moving through our orientation away from how we usually approach opportunities.  Even the word change has a connotation that we attach to it is negative.  An incredibly wise mentor - Stephen De Sede and I once talked about the power of words and how using the right word can make all the difference.  When you couple that with a mind sight - vision of what you want to live into where your vision and passion includes others, you have found an internal power.

Notwithstanding, the habits and routines that we invest in every day.  Those activities you have heard often bear repeating - Gratitude, Forgiveness, Positivity, Creativity, Kindness, Service, Positive Affirming Subconscious connection, and connecting with a life coach or mentor.  We spend minutes, hours, days, weeks, months years wading through the turbulent waters or our mind in the pursuit of a relentless resolve in understanding our mind set.  A key and critical changing moment for me is when I heard the words from Stephen De Sede during his Live Insights show, where I was a guest.

        Passionately spoken and articulated with empowerment, Stephen said, "Most people are trying to refocus what they are set on by forcing yourself to change and you are not going to.

This was the key to unlocking the door for me because intuitively and instinctively something was missing.  There was a path I need to find to break past the dark deep coding of my subconscious.  It is like that scene in the movie Matrix when Neo knows he must stand before the source, the architect to ask for help to hack the mainframe to defeat the Matrix's arch enemy.  He knew it was an inevitable path and so do I.  Stephen provided the greatest hack and for that I am eternally grateful.

Not only are we to be pedantic in our efforts to rise above the hum and trill of life but we need to constantly be aware of where our vision or perspective is arriving.  Mind Sight is the key to ensuring we arrive at the place we want to become.  Do you know your vision, passion and outcome?  Does your story align with that vision, passion and outcome?   Is your purpose aligned to include others or is it just about you?  

For me I learnt at a young age, purposefully that it was always about someone else, not me.  When I felt that message at 10-11 years of age, I have been on a secret mission to find the other one person to touch their life.  I still follow that ethos with a deep current of kindness some 40 years later.  Recently that ethos has come to the surface with much more meaningful soul language, the courier being a like-minded soul names Stephen De Sede. 

To answer my own questions, I will quote myself from a previous blog because it is my VISION, PASSION AND OUTCOME: 

"What matters to me, with all my soul and heart is that I write what my intuition and heart feel.  Even greater, that it touches a life, (one soul) that indelibly inscribes a moment on their soul."

Being a hero in the making is not about followers, likes, how many views or comments, it is about living with a vision, passion and outcome that includes humanity and purpose for others, not self.  It is a culmination of hope, kindness and giving.  Servant Leadership is a key strategy in today's climate that we all need to exemplify and amplify.  Without this humanity-based leadership, we will fall short in creating the change we want to see.

We are all human beings first and as such there is a need to connect soulfully with heart looking past the labels and isms we created.

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SOUL HEART RECOMMENDATION: 

If you want to know now to shift your mind sight, your vision and purpose then check out the video link. Stephen De Sede's content will soulfully move you.  His passion and purpose is clear.  He is driven by his conviction to move humanity one soul at a time.

https://youtu.be/WgVEn19CAgk

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IMAGE: FIND YOUR PASSION: https://www.insidehighered.com/news/2018/07/24/study-creating-your-passions-more-effective-finding-them

IMAGE: PHOENIX https://www.amazon.com/JAWO-Fantasy-Tapestry-Volcanic-Tapestries/dp/B07HBQK5LT

IMAGE: KEY https://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-a-skeleton-key.htm

UNSUNG EXTRAORDINARY HEROES - THE FEAR FACTOR and OUR NAKED TRUTH

Ironically, this month as we know asserts itself as the spook-able fall season where we deliberately go out of our way to get scared, feel the fear for a thrill.  Amidst the ghouls, goblins, ghosts, the witching hour of truth is upon us.  In retrospect, my first sentence speaks volumes about life and its impossibilities that we face fearfully every day and yet in the month of October we deliberately find courage to go to that haunted mansion, spook house even though we are scared out of our wits.  In contrast, where does that courage to face that fear come from.

Why would we, again deliberately with passion, forethought and conviction go our of our way to experience a scare and yet those day to day moments where fear is present every moment do we not summon the same sense of courage.

Do we embrace the fear factor out of peer pressure. not wanting the opinion or vision of ourselves to be diminished in front of many.  It seems as though for some it is all of the above.  Do those reasons legitimize our reason for moving forward, perhaps but I think it is far greater than ego or opinion. 

Originally this blog was going to be about how we can face fear and move into our naked truth, however it seems that I have a message to share about myself and how I relate to fear and TRUTH.  My naked vulnerable truth amidst all that I am, is that I am afraid that my writing and capacity to connect on an intuitive, empaths plain is not good enough and my life experiences to not merit even a hushed whisper.  I am afraid th
at what I bring to the universe will not even help one person even though I know the truth - that it's a self driven ego and critical brain that steps in the puddle and garner's supreme doubt and self adversity so that I can keep the status quo.

I admit that daily I struggle with my inner critic and intuitively know the answers to the battle in my mind that creates and yet here I am in my most vulnerable, naked undressed, down to the core of my soul moment making an admission of my truth and now that I face that FEAR, that dark., the thing that I choose to hold me back, it seem less daunting.

As cliché as the phrase sounds, FACE THE FEAR AND DO IT ANY WAY is, there is truth at least for me.  My truth is that I had to push myself to write my truth, so that I could see how I needed to dismiss, yes dismiss the fear.

The only mutual approbation I need, is with my self.  To love, approve, accept who I am and even how I think, feel and write.  What opinion, you the reader has, is really up to you. I do not have control your thoughts, ideology and principles.  I do have a huge responsibility to be true to myself, honest in what I do and respectful to those around me.  Those are my bench marks and I have no expectation for you to do like wise.  The only expectation is that you receive the message you need to hear in the moment and follow through with the intuitive action that comes such a message.

FEAR can leave us begging and pleading, however we need to change the language and framing associated with FEAR.  In my moment of reconciling myself to my fears, I realized that I have to kindly and compassionately love myself, the moment and the narrative I give to fear.  Realizing that you are anticipating a fear to follow after you make a commitment to yourself seems universally counter intuitive but as Stephen De Sede teaches, "anticipating creates a space of managing."

With anticipation that you will feel a sense of fear, the next step is to find gratitude for the moment.  By letting the universe know you are grateful for the moment to grow, and any other feelings you have toward gratitude, you instantly dissipate the vibrations related to that stronghold emotion.

As that sense initially starts to lessen it's grip, think for a moment, Who today, can I serve and be kind to?  Shift your thinking to someone else instead of self.  I have found as I think of how I can serve someone else in my moment of fear that those negative emotions do not suffocate me as much.  Often it is a simple as sending a heart felt text or call to a friend.

The final next level up is the language we speak to ourselves.  This morning as I showered, I knew the task I had before me.  I had to face my fear and write about it, just so I could get back into the writing saddle and achieve my goals that I had left by the wayside for 2 months believing that my writing was not enough.  My level up way of speaking to myself was to frame the language of the word fear in a positive segment.

That positive segment brought me joy, hope and a realization that I have life experiences, hope, a love of people to share with the universe and my goal is and always have been that if I touch  one (1) soul, then I am doing fantastic.  Not staggering statistics to lean into but real,  relevant and soul driven.  I am not here to get thousands of likes or unforgettable comments.  My mission and purpose is to write and share soulfully again to touch a soul, one moment, one person at a time.

Lets get to the core of the matter - Fear of ... failure, not being good enough, unlovable, unworthy.  We have all said those dogmatic, degradation and unfulfilling, dissatisfied statements to ourselves at some point in time.  It is the venom of self hate and loathing.  It is time to lean into an new perspective and language.   In that moment of fear we each have  a choice to be paralyzed by it or change the perspective, channel and narrative language

F - Freedom to choose

E - Expressions of

A- Adoration and Loving

R - Reflections of Self Love

Here is the positive affirmation that will let fear go: "I am free to choose the expression of adoration and loving reflections of self love."  While saying this statement out loud,  find a reflex point, or a chakra to tap this powerful expression of you.

Fear is the opposite of hope, belief and faith.  I have come to believe today that I have a mission and purpose to fulfil and it doesn't matter how many hear my message or if I write imperfectly or not in accordance to what society deems substantial.  What matters to me, with all my soul and heart is that I write what my intuition and heart feel.  Even greater, that it touches a life that indelibly inscribes a moment on their soul.

I stand unafraid willing to take the risk on myself to believe and move forward anticipating and expecting I will be afraid and that is okay.  To be an unsung extraordinary hero living an ordinary life, we have put aside our fear and find a way to work it out so that we don't leave ourselves behind on the platform of life.